Christmas nightmares
“Mama! The laundry room is covered in squidgy bits of apple and cinnamon!” was how my daughter woke me up bright and early on Boxing Day morning.
After a wakeful night, holding my son’s hand through his seemingly endless nightmares, the brain was still out of action.
Mmmm… apples and cinnamon!
In the laundry room?
….
WHAT?
I rushed downstairs to discover that those squidgy apple and cinnamon bits – which the anklebiter had stepped in – were in fact…
…. puke. Dog vomit.
Less fragrant than cinnamon, for sure.
It seems that Sir Pe was up all night with our friends’ dog, who managed to puke three times in the living room. Narrowly missing the sofa, TV and lovely, fluffy rug. After cleaning up after him three times, he finally put the dog in the laundry room and shut the door.
The apples and cinnamon that met my eyes would have made the director of The Exorcist proud! It was the kind of projectile vomiting that managed to coat the door at the far end of the room as well as every available surface of wall, floor and washing machine with sick.
After half an hour of scrubbing and nose holding, the laundry room was cleaned. And that was before my first cup of morning coffee! Then it was a brisk walk back to our friends’ house with the poor dog in tow – before he blew again. And blow he did!
Couple that sleepless night with a 5 am wake-up call on Christmas Eve after a late night of wrapping presents, and my eyes are redder than a stop light, with more lines than a leg full of varicose veins.
So… what did you get for Christmas?
What did I get? It doesn’t matter really. It pales into insignificance by comparison.
December 28, 2008 at 10:38
Oh Yummy! Honestly. You folks are much too squeamish about vomit. To us dogs it’s simply a way of enjoying one’s food all over again. The trouble is you usually clear it up before we can get to it. I tell you, I’m so sick of turkey at the mo……no, I guess that wouldn’t go down well with you humans. I don’t want to start digging a hole;)
December 28, 2008 at 10:57
Oh, heavens, this will definitely be one of those Christmas stories that will be told for generations after generations. How completely and utterly and awesomely awful. Are you talking again to Sir Pe yet? How long will it be before you can look your neighbours in the eyes without wanting to bop them?
December 28, 2008 at 11:00
Nasty, did the dog eat christmas human food to make his stomach so upset or was it just the holiday itself which made him puke?? Poor thing, well, there has been some vomitting here also, especially after some seriously fatty pork..guess it’s not good for a dog either! Hope the dog feels better and just want you to know I will NEVER look at apples and cinnamon the same again….thanks
Get some rest!!!!
December 28, 2008 at 11:39
Gosh, that’s a lot of work. I wouldn’t even clean the house myself…I’d ask my hubby :p
December 28, 2008 at 13:59
What did I get for Christmas? Your post! Good fun.
June in Oz
December 28, 2008 at 14:13
Oh I got a couple’s teaset…lol. (i.e. a teapot with 2 cups and if you place the cup on top of one another an entire picture would be formed) will post later. It was actually a game of exchanging presents.
December 28, 2008 at 15:33
Yuk! That’s the yukkiest Christmas post I’ve read…
December 28, 2008 at 16:53
I’m with Lee, what did we get? LOL Honestly nothing compares to what you got!!!!
Eeeuuuuuuwww.
Jen
December 28, 2008 at 16:54
Thanks for the compliment, Lousie!
Jen: yes – Eeeuuuww is a good way of putting it.
Lilialia: Poor dog is hospitalized so I didn’t really feel that angry with the neighbours. Sir Pe cleared up three pukes during the hours of 12-4 am, so I didn’t feel too bad about only clearing up one!
June and Lee: Thanks!
Amy: It was probably the Christmas ham…
Henry: Ask mum to give you some of Madonna’s bicep instead. Gotta be tastier than turkey, right?
December 28, 2008 at 17:28
Bluefish: See above comment. Hubby did clear up three messes…
December 28, 2008 at 17:28
Well, after a couple of power-naps later on in the day, I was fine.
I’m glad I missed the “apple and cinnamon” puke anyway. The ones I cleaned up were more of the “rice and dishwater” variety :-p.
December 28, 2008 at 17:30
wow…….not where I was expecting that story to go…lol.
We had a wonderful Jul in Denmark. Mads and I gave each other a flat screen plasma and are now sitting here, enjoying it with Indiana jones on.. lol.
totally a guys choice! But I figure he watches enough chick flicks with me!
December 28, 2008 at 20:07
Ummmm why did you have the neighbours dog???
If I had anyones dog I would be sure it was’nt a puking one!
It sounds pretty darn awful actually for both pooch and you guys who were doing the cleaning!!!
December 28, 2008 at 21:51
Poor dog, poor you and definitely poor Sir Pe!
December 28, 2008 at 23:12
Poor thing, they can help it..but they don’t know their own stomachs only their heads..I bet he got Pancretitis..tough to get over…no fun for anyone. Sir Pe, you did good, Lady Fi, my sympathy and I did so like the description of your eyeballs..very, very FUNNY!
December 29, 2008 at 02:04
As I was reading this, I kept saying “Oh. My. Gosh.” out loud. My husband yelled from the family room, “What’s going on?”
“Christmas nightmares” is the understatement of THE YEAR! Thank you for not posting a photo of the actual nightmare. I would bring you something comforting and clean if I lived closer. You’re a VERY good woman.
December 29, 2008 at 03:04
Kelli: I like Indiana Jones!
Lacey: Our friends’ cousin is allergic to dogs… even when they are not puking.
Kottemamman and Far Side: Thanks!
Csquare: Thanks for the kind thoughts!
December 29, 2008 at 10:11
That is just nasty!
December 29, 2008 at 20:49