Snake in your pants … or excuse me, there’s a snake in my toilet!

Lunch is getting cold when the phone rings. It’s Sir Pe explaining that he has to take a longer way home due to a large black snake with a white V on its head sitting right in the middle of the narrow bridge. Immobile. Tongue flickering. With a mean look in its eye.

He thinks it’s a poisonous adder.

I do what any sane person would do and rush out with my camera to try and take a photo of the magnificent creature. Unfortunately it’s moved off into the verge and slithers away quickly when it hears the shutter noise of the camera.

I return home feeling brave. My Facebook friends tell me later on that it looks like a harmless grass snake.

But I still feel brave because I took photos for you, dear readers, anyway – thinking it was a dangerous reptile!

Which brings me to the title of this post.

When I lived in China back in the 1980s, I visited many a temple perched picturesquely atop mountains.

Climbing thousands of stairs carved into the mountainside under a hot sun works up a thirst. So, you drink a lot.

And eventually, you have to pee.

Now toilets back then were non-existent, or – if you were lucky – large sheds with ditches overflowing with human waste.

So, you didn’t enter them unless you had to.

I just needed to empty my bladder. So, I wandered off into some brush, hid behind a large rock …

… and relieved myself. For quite a long time.

As I was finishing, I noticed a large black body and a very cross beady eye looking at me.

Somehow, I had managed to step on a snake and immobilize it while peeing on its body.

I jumped into the air and it slithered off looking … well … very pissed off.

Apparently, peeing on a snake stops it from biting you. Who knew?

Which brings back memories of that time in China when I came eye to eye with an angry green Tree Python.

But that, dear friends, is a story for another time.

So – what unusual toilets have you experienced?

For other, hopefully, snake-free adventures, check out: Camera Critters.

38 responses

  1. You’re my hero! Peeing on snakes – I’ll try to remember that.

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 18:24

  2. Holy cow! That is scary. Not a fan of snakes.

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 18:26

  3. A story after my own heart! Wonderful. I’ve had a few encounters with snakes, mostly not very exciting, and I certainly never have been (un) fortunate enough to pee on a snake. (The fortunate part would be that I’d have a great story.)

    What I now would like to see is your face and your escape once you realized what you were doing. It would have made a wonderful YouTube video! Where are those cameras when you really want them?

    And what unfortunate toilets have I experienced? Let me count the ways!

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 18:35

  4. Cecilia

    Lol! Only you, Fi…only you! πŸ˜‰

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 18:49

  5. SirPe

    I wonder if it works on wasps :-p

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 18:53

  6. Oh what a story, I never knew anyone that peed on a snake before..you are my hero. You were very brave to want to capture a poisonous adder for us..but really Lady Fi show some restraint for your own safety! πŸ™‚

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 18:58

  7. lilalia

    I’ve always liked snakes and do not quite understand why so many people are afraid of them, for they only (usually) attack when they are first attacked. (Or, maybe when someone steps and pees on them.) Great photos and stories.

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 19:05

  8. Oh my lord……
    Is this fact or fiction?!
    If it’s fact, girl you are the coolest friend I have! πŸ™‚

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 20:28

  9. I don’t know right now whether to call you insane or brave!
    I HATE SNAKES!
    Me? I would be packing my bags and moving from the country! That’s how much I hate ’em.

    Thanks for visiting. [and being such an insanely brave blogger]

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 20:41

  10. Looking pissed [on] off … LOL!

    Here’s the most interesting toilet I ever experienced is described here http://carminesuperiore.blogspot.com/2008/10/carmine-creepy-crawlies.html

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 21:30

  11. oh my…i dont know if i should laugh or be frightful for you in peeing on the snake…lol.

    i lived in the woods for a year..we dug our own privy, built the house and box as well…but i always made sure i had fresh batteries at night before venturing inside…

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 22:08

  12. and you so need to tell the other story…

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 22:09

  13. I think that snake looks positively dangerous and you were so brave to get his photo

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 22:29

  14. Yikes! What an adventure!

    Like

    August 14, 2010 at 22:30

  15. cloudia charters

    you are amazing! China? snakes? Must come here lots more often!

    Warm Aloha from Waikiki πŸ™‚

    Comfort Spiral

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 01:45

  16. You did what any what kind of person would do? (I’ve taken pictures of snakes too, so whatever kind of person it is, I’m one too!), Uh — I think I have to defer to you on the unusual toilet issue, We’ve done a lot of primitive and semi-primitive camping, but nothing could top your story,

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 03:26

  17. I am scared of snakes…

    what a daring post.
    have a fun weekend.
    πŸ˜‰

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 05:12

  18. I’m LOL!
    What a story – the snake was ‘pissed off’ – you are too funny. πŸ™‚
    Love the tiger image – cute!

    Thanks for your visit to my fawn.

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 06:10

  19. I like snakes, but I don’t think I’d want my hoo-ha quite that close to one.

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 06:56

  20. . . . and you lived to tell the tale. I wonder how many snakes have had a similar experience. We’ll never know πŸ™‚
    The snake you photographed is a big beastie.

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 07:29

  21. Blu

    So next time I see a snake I just wet myself!!!!! eek Best wishes Blu x

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 11:51

  22. Jen

    You got me at the poisionous part, they have them there?

    Very brave of you to go and get the photos, bad guy or not.

    Jen

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 16:25

  23. I’ve peed in the wild more times than I can count (toilets on an excavation? HA!) and never managed to pee on a snake. I’ve startled a mongoose, but not peed on it.

    Once upon a time, some of us archaeologists were drinking one night at a site that will remain nameless when two of us girls realized we had to pee and didn’t want to go all the way back to the toilets. We figured we’d just pee in the dark behind the ruins (we were drinking, you see, it sounded like a completely intelligent thing to do at the time) and so we went together and then held hands while we peed to keep ourselves from falling over. The next day we noticed that where we’d gone to relieve ourselves was right next to a rather large open pit and we were lucky to not have fallen in. Or to have gotten stung by a scorpion or bit by a snake for that matter. I’ve peed in the dark in the wild since then, but I’ve always remembered to bring a flashlight.

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 16:59

  24. Funny story! I can’t say that I’ve experienced any unusual toilets… not that I can think of anyway!

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 18:44

  25. I like snakes. But I also have the greatest respect of them. To bad you the snake did not show itΒ΄s head.

    Like

    August 15, 2010 at 22:18

  26. Oh My … I just can’t get over you stepping on a snake and peeing on it!!!!

    Like

    August 16, 2010 at 02:25

  27. You were very brave taking the photo Fi. Re- toilets, my Dad was in the army WW2 and used to joke that the toilets they had was a trench with a wooden plank over it and you sat on the plank. He reckoned if you fell in the trench you would come up with a set of gold teeth… – Dave

    Like

    August 16, 2010 at 10:17

  28. Eeeek!! I’m not really sure what else to say….except the idea of you peeing on a snake made me giggle

    C x

    Like

    August 16, 2010 at 12:48

  29. I loved the story of your running out to take a photo for the blog. I always think along those lines too. As to toilets, my least favorite was in Turkey. It was just a few years ago but it was a hole dug into the ground over which we had to squat. The squatting wasn’t bad but the smell and the bugs were. Oh, well, Turkey was so beautiful, I didn’t really mind. Just another experience.

    I loved your adventures and thanks for sharing them.

    Like

    August 16, 2010 at 14:55

  30. Haha, fantastic story! More like this!

    Definitely a grass snake, the white/yellow “ears” give it away. Adders are either all black or have a black diamond pattern on grey/brown.

    Like

    August 16, 2010 at 19:21

  31. Thank you, thank you, thank you – I’m still laughing here in CO!

    Like

    August 17, 2010 at 07:14

  32. no!!!! seriously??!!

    I am in awe of your fascinating adventures… and of this in particular , even for it’s ick factor.

    Like

    August 17, 2010 at 17:59

  33. A fraternity brother of hubbys had a Boa he would let roam free in the frat house. The snake would go down the toilet and sometimes be gone for days but would always return home through the downstairs toilet. It wasn’t unusual for female screams blarin’ from the commode. I always avoided that restroom when visitin’!

    God bless ya girl!

    Like

    August 17, 2010 at 22:07

  34. No toilet story like yours. Only one I can think of is having an awful stomach problem in Sri Lanka on a train with a hole in the ground as a toilet. I was only 18 at the time.

    Like

    August 17, 2010 at 22:23

  35. oh my goodness, peeing on a snake! i would have died of fright!!

    Like

    August 18, 2010 at 09:25

  36. Nope, I have zero bathroom stories to compare with that one. Although I will probably now relive my old fear about something coming up through a toilet and…. Eeeek!

    Like

    August 18, 2010 at 19:21

  37. I have to say I have NEVER experienced anything like your story. I drove across the desert once and stopped at a bathroom where the signs warned us to check under the toilet seat as rattlesnakes were attracted to the cool of the porcelain and might be coiled inside the bowl, even under the rim if they were small enough to fit. That’s about as exciting as my story gets, as I found no snakes, thank goodness!
    An English Girl Rambles

    Like

    August 21, 2010 at 23:59

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