Punish me some more… please!

This blog is all about the big things in life. Oh yes! Failures, politics and passionate sewing tales…

Ready for another one? Then come stroll with me down memory lane … back back in the mists of time, when I was a poor naive girl locked up in a cold-hearted boarding school in the south of England. (Are you feeling sorry for me yet?)

old_schoolThis tale also involves needle and thread. You see – one bright sunny Sunday morning at said boarding school, I was getting ready to go to church and put on my candy-striped school uniform (a dress). Most of the clothes we wore were ‘recycled’ or second-hand, if you like, and this was no different. The poor dress was feeling a bit tired around the hem and had somehow managed to come unravelled (just like my mind).

Needless to say, an eagle-eyed matron spotted the falling-down hem, and before I could say, “Terribly sorry, old chum! I’ll just go and sew it up again, shall I now?” I was sent back upstairs to the dorm with a needle and thread in my hands.

So, I lay down on my bed (it was the bottom bunk) on top of a psychedelic 70s, slightly frayed and grubby, bedspread and proceeded to sew the hem back up. Without taking the dress off first. Because I was in a bit of a hurry as we had to go off to church.

Well – you know what is coming next, don’t you?

The matron told me to get a move on and when I got up ….

… the whole bedspread followed after me like a mermaid tail gone wrong.

That’s right – here’s a newsflash! If you try to sew a hem while still wearing your dress and not being able to see at the back properly, then you will succeed in sewing yourself onto the bedspread!

For some strange reason, the matron got very upset as she thought that I had sewn myself onto the bedspread on purpose. (She should have realized by now that I was just no good at sewing!)

sleeping-helen1I was packed off back to the dorm and told to stay on my bed, unpick the bedspread from my dress, and miss church!

Poor me: I was forced to languish on my bed and read a book whilst bathing in a glorious shaft of sunlight. 90 minutes of pure bliss on my own.

With punishments like that – who needs rewards?

29 thoughts on “Punish me some more… please!

  1. See, that is why we all need to make mistakes, so we will never get attached to bedspreads again! Your story sure put a smile on my face.


  2. so so funny! Am totally hopeless at sewing. All my efforts as child would end up grey and unappealing, owing to my hot hands just not getting to grips with needle and thread.
    Once sewed myself to curtain.


  3. I would have killed to have gone to boarding school! To this day i complain to my parents that they didn’t love me enough to send me away from them. How was i going to be like the Girls of St. Clair without boarding school?! *sob*


  4. I would have killed to have gone to boarding school! To this day i complain to my parents that they didn’t love me enough to send me away from them. How was i going to be like the Girls of St. Clair without boarding school?! *sob*


  5. I’m afraid to say that I hated my boarding school days… but for some, it probably was like those books you read…


  6. Well, folks, I have to say that I think, as far as I can remember that far back, that I really enjoyed it. I loved all the sports. But there was always a tight knot in my stomach on Sunday afternoons when I was spending the weekend with my best friend (and she had a brother with lovely, grey eyes).
    For years afterwards, I would get that knotted feeling on Sunday evenings.
    I fear sending my girl to boarding school in case that feeling returns!!


  7. That is just too funny. I think to be honest that I might have “accidently” sewn something onto a tablecloth once. But you were a clever girl, weren’t you.

    They really sound mean there, how did you ever survive?



  8. Hey Ladyfi 🙂 Thanks for coming to visit me today, much appreciated. Well…that was some experience….seems hilarious in hindsight but I bet it wasn’t at the time!


  9. Ladyfi you are hilarious! I think the reason I dont have as many funny sewing stories as you is because I avoided sewing like the plague. And people did not like to give me needles.

    Lucky you found a man who can sew right?


  10. I am sitting in the middle of Denmark, cracking up as I read this!!! The visual you shared in your story was totally classic!! Another testament as to why I do not attempt to sew!!


  11. The reason Mother of the Cousins enjoyed boarding school is she was a goody-goody!!
    I hated boarding school, it’s not like St Clair and if I had had children myself vowed I would NEVER send them to boarding school.
    After 26 years I still hate Mother’s Day because of the memory of being forced to take flowers at church and having no mother to give them to- only Matron.


  12. Hi lady fi! I want to take BATW to Sweden next week…Would you like to be our hostess next Wednesday, November 12?? Shoot me an email and let me know!


  13. Boarding school was traumatic for me. I didn’t go to an exclusive prep school in the US. I went to a Catholic boarding school beginning at age 6. We were overseen by a nun who had no business caring–and that’s not the right word–for children. When I’ve seen stories about idyllic boarding schools filled with fun, love, etc., I sigh. I’m glad to know that not everyone endured what I and my friends did.

    Stop by my blog–girlssentaway.wordpress.com.


  14. FYI Delia cabe: our school was a church of england school in Sussex, in the UK, certainly not an exclusive US school!! But I sympathise with the whole Catholic thing as I knew a girl in a catholic orphanage who had no name- only a number, then years later found out No.32 was her sister!! And that is the only publishable story about that orphanage- the rest is too cruel to repeat, you have my sympathy.


  15. Hahahaha! I can just see it! Did you spread that tip around to get other girls off the hook too? 🙂 I can just imagine that there are so many stories like this throughout the years.

    Thanks for submitting your post to BPOTW!


  16. OK, this is hilarious! Is this really a true story? I cannot imaging how terrible it must have been, but what a funny story you have now! I am hoping you can laugh about it!


  17. My boys are boarding at the same school as The Cousins and they love it. My 10 year old always opts never to come home. I can tell how long it has been since he came home by how short his jumpers have got along the arms. Need to buy some new ones urgently…


  18. Your 10 year old opts never to come home?
    As an ex-boarder I can tell you that’s not a good sign…
    You’re going to miss out on so much – as evidenced by the out-growing of his clothes – and your bond will grow weaker and weaker.
    Which is why he stays at school, staying wrapped up at school where he knows he has to live is easier than coming home for short bursts. Going home is hard when you’re at boarding school, it makes you feel weird and out of place and you see what you’re missing out on. And then when you get back to school you realise how much you miss home all over again and it takes a few miserable days to get back into it.
    That’s the truth. Your boys don’t love boarding school, they just want emotional stability so it’s easier not to come home only to be taken back there.


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